Oh that Mr. Sutter

So Brando is all, Dad, I don't need you to come down to the shady used car lot to talk to Sylvester McMonkey McBean and his random southern accent I got this playa and Jim is all I'm proud of you, son, for working so hard and saving your money and buying this 1967 vintage Mustang that purrs like a kitten and runs like a cheetah and OMS is all FORESHADOWING ON THE 90210? EFFING BRILLIANT and Brenda is all I got it bad got it bad got it bad I'm hot for teacher and Andrea is all MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY he mine and Mr. Sutter is all, hey, why don't *both* of you let me drive you around Beverly Hills in my Dateline NBC truck and Andrea's like, "You know, Chris, my glasses aren't the only thing I like big and on my face" and Brenda is all, "Chris, I have a boyfriend named Dylan in Hawaii but next year he's going to f*ck my best friend while I'm in Paris with drama queen Donna so all I'm trying to say is feel free to make your move, buddy," and Mr. Sutter is all I think I'll pick the dork because Lord knows she needs some and I'll probably get away with it because she'll be too busy crying and committing suicide when I make my getaway back to Chicago and besides, she so totally has a thing for older men and Andrea is all, "Coffee? With me? When class is over and you're not my teacher? I think I just had what they call an orgasm" and Brandon is all GIVE ME BACK MY CAR MCBEAN and McBean is like whoa, hoss, you bought that vintage piece of sh*t SUCKA and Steve is all Kelly has a rash (!) and can't your dad pay for this like everybody else's dads pay for this and Brando is all EFF THAT Jimbo *gets off* (!) when this sh*t happens to us and then he's all maybe I can get my job back at the Peach Pit and Nat is all whatever dude, you bailed on me without two weeks notice and I hired Lucy Lu and she's efficient and that reminds me, I need to update the jukebox with more outdated '50s music and speaking of music, oh no they didn't. OMG Roxette's Joy Ride was actually playing in the car when Mr. Sutter played bookworm bitches over there.

Oh. And Brando so totally gets his job back at the Peach Pit. Don't eff with Brandon Effing Walsh, bitches. And Bren unleashes the best bitch slap ever on Andrea during their scene in Mr. Sutter's class and later on, after class, Mr. Sutter is all Andrea, oh, so about this whole tapping your ass thing before I leave for Chicago, well, see, um, I have a girlfriend prettier than this sweet cheery red blazer and Andrea is all, whatever, Jesse has a bigger mule anyways and the gang all end up at the end of summer party at the beach club and Brenda is all Dylan, we need to talk see, um, I had a small crush on my older man teacher this summer but I never did anything with him because Andrea -- yes, geeky dorky 38-year-old Andrea Zuckerman -- stole him from me and Dylan was all whatever Bren, I was doing coke lines of vag in Hawaii so we're totally even.

OK. We made up the last part.