Wednesday, September 19, 2007

HERE IS YOUR WINNER, AND NEEEEWWWWW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION...

The SHOWERRRRR LINNNNNNNNERRRRR!

It was a tough road to the championship for The Liner. But when the match began, oh Katie bar the barnyard door.

He started the mind games early, with the blowing up and into the shower as soon as the bell rang and the water spurted. The former champ had no shot from then on. The Liner was Clubber Lang to the champ's Rocky, um, the first time, within seconds of the shampoo coming into play.

Up and in. The Liner jumped each time the former Champ reached for the soap, face moisturizer or conditioner. It was curtains for the former Champ when he soaped up his sculpted yet skinny legs and, again, felt the wrath of the attacking liner.

Six minutes in, the former Champ tapped out. He turned off the water, defeated, and stared down The Liner. "Today, he was the better man," the former, now forlorn, Champ muttered.

Predicatably, The Liner returned to form. Quiet. Cool. Calm. Collected.

Champion.

4 comments:

Old Man Snap said...

Meanwhile...

Gob of Veggie Cream Cheese: 1.
Tie: 0.

Old Man Snap said...

Now then, before you shoot us dead, at least hand us a beer?

From the work email, moments ago...

Tomorrow (9/20/07)….new item…PRETZEL DOGS! We will still have the regular Philly hot pretzels; however we thought we’d try something new…we’ll only order 50, so first come, first serve! Let us know what you think.

Old Man Snap said...

Oh. And "PRETZEL DOGS!" appeared in red ink and in like Egyptian bold font or some sh*t.

Help. Us. Please.

Matt Katz said...

you only have 364 days to go!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XC7e_UrsF9k