First off, y'all know that *we've* been doing these 90210 recaps looooooong before the 902102008 campaign blitzes started, right? Y'all know we probably are to blame for the show coming back, updated! With Tristan Wilds and Kelly *and* Brenda!
So yeah, we learned today that the Soap Net is running a 90210 marathon starting Labor Day at midnight. Hilarity shall doth ensue in these here parts! It's like Old Man Snap's ultimate dream, this blogging 90210 from the very beginning! Maybe we'll get a contract to be funny all the time and not just in our heads!
(And we know we're especially with the exclamation points this morning. Yay! Hungover as Operation Sobriety begins!).
Now, then:
OMG we haven't seen the 90210 in far too long with the working and the softballing and the running and the actual doing things with our life on Saturday mornings but HOLY ESS Kelly just got out of rehab and damnit we missed the ultrahot Coke Kelly phase with the black eyeliner and fingercuffs and all of these things and Steve is all IT'S MY BIRTHDAY and the KEG guys are all, no Steve's weirdly-cast brothers, you can't underage imbibe even though we *so* did in Season Five and the weirdly-cast brothers are all whatevs we're stealing alcohol from party-goers and Party-Goer #1 is all, "HEY! Someone stole my beer!" (and thinking, "Sh*t, *this* is my big Hollywoods break?") and speaking of goers, Donna is all, no hunky quarterback I won't dance with you because my last boyfriend totally launched me down the stairs but had a great hit with The Heights and hunky quarterback is all, whatevs, my career will skyrocket after this ridiculously overdramatic piece of Americana and Hollywoods is all, "No, not really, hunky quarterback, you might as well go try out for Brazzers or some sh*t" and Valerie is all, I think it's a great idea to bring Cokehead Colin to the party so Kelly can awkwardly kiss him on the cheek in hopes of licking one last hit from his pores and Brandon is all, Christ, it was so much more fun when *I* got to hit that.
Man, we missed this.
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