"Do you like beavers in America?"

Why, yes. Yes we do.

So we're back. When we figure out what f*cking day it is, we'll bring the funny. In the meantime, thanks to MK for holding down the fort and a little bit maybe making fun of us. A little bit. Maybe.

But oh do we have stories. About rolls for Bon Jovi and a 1970s cover band ("Diese nexta songe ist BAT MOON A-RISING JA!") and a plane pretending its touchdown dance should equal King Kong Bundy splashing Hulk Hogan.

And to the guy from Oregon at the airport bar who talked incessantly about consolidation in the workplace and how it's strangled production in key areas of marketability: we don't think the guy from Birming'm just drinking his tea tallyho really gave a pig's pence about your corporate conundrums.

But you were a nice fella who saw U2 in San Francisco for the Under a Blood Red Sky tour, so ya got that goin' for ya.

***
Currently listening to: The Band's Atlantic City cover, which never gets old. Ever.

We've been practicing

Fahrt diese Zug zum Hauptbahnhof?

Ja? Danke.

In other words, we're off to do stuff for eight days a week.

God speed, all ya'll fives of readers. God speed.

She gave her a what, now, to whom?

Sandy Cohen wrote this? Oh the hilarity. And oh the conflict of interest. We mean, you're the coolest dad ever and a lawyer don't you have your hands full with your stoner son and you have time to write a mistake-ridden wrap-up?

Seth got accepted to Brown? We thought it was the RISPEEEEE. And what about Donna Martin? Did she graduate or what?

The class of 2006, which includes Marissa, Ryan, Seth and Summer, graduated from Harbor High School. Seth and Summer were accepted by the same college. Ryan was reunited with his mother, who gave him a Land Cruiser as a graduation gift. Marissa's mom gave her a pearl necklace, while her dad gave her an opportunity to work with him on a yacht set to sail around the Greek islands.

To the So I guy

So I...

So I...

So I...

So I...

So I...

So I...

We counted. Six "So Is" in the course of a 20-minute conversation with your date. We could feel her pain, even if she was too busy downing her third Manhattan to feel anything, let alone empty solidarity.

You were like clockwork. Lull in the conversation? So I... Finishing the punchline? So I... Time for *another* drink? So I...

Nice work, So I Guy.

So a guy walks into the doctor's office...

Short dad: OK. We need you to come in here.

Kid with unusually big head and Gameboy: No. I don't wanna.

SD: Come on. We need you in this room now. Let's go.

KWUBHAG: I told you I don't wanna.

SD: Please? It'll make your mommy happy. And you can bring your Gameboy.

KWUBHAG: OK.

And END SCENE.